Oh don't we love drama...

It is inevitable that there is always going to be drama in our everyday lives, whether we like it or not. There's always going to be gossip whether we realize we are doing it or not. And of course there are bound to be arguments or fights between couples, but it is up to the individuals involved to decide how they are going to react or deal with the problems at that time.
Our most recent fight was about a week ago, we were crabby at each other for a couple of days. I was primarily the more aggravated one because at the time DeeAnna was unemployed, and I was the only one working. Now I had saved money in my saving account which slowly was dwindling away to pay for things and at times I had used it because hey I had the money and either I or she wanted something and I figured hey why not? Well those hey why nots slowly added up and I was also using that money to help us get by. Well I was getting frustrated because I felt a little under appreciated because I was the only one working and all she had to was cook and clean and things like that. I know it sounds 1950's but I thought it was fair, well I was getting annoyed dinner would come so late on my shift or the bedroom at times looked like it was barely picked up and on top of it I was sexually frustrated. All of those things are a recipe for a crab ass a.k.a me.
I was not the loving person I usually am with her I flat out asked her what do we have in common? she replied shocked and hurt I asked that. She asked "Why? What are you getting at? Are you trying to leave me?" I wasn't I don't know what I was hoping to gain by asking that question so I simply said "No, but answer the question." She just looked at me because we do but don't have a lot in common but that works for us, we see things differently which for me is good because she helps me out a lot with stress and things like that. But I continued to keep this tough attitude and demeanor with her, and further pressed on about how I was so frustrated with everything I basically reached the breaking point my feelings. I told her I was frustrated with how I keep asking her to do things and it takes days until it's done or how things are still dirty and I can't do everything! But wait... did I ever consider what she does do? Did I ever think about what I don't do? Nope. This would make me look even worse in about 1 minute. So I said "look I don't want to talk anymore OK? And I know you don't I'm just going to leave" I looked at her and I saw her eyes swelling with tears and boom I snapped out of it "What's wrong? why are you about to cry?" "You're just going to leave. Where are you going?" I replied unsure of leaving now, "I don't know...out. Just out driving somewhere, anywhere." I started to go upstairs but I took one last look and returned towards her.
I sat on the arm of the couch swinging my legs and rubbing the back of my neck, "Look..(an exasperated sigh)we need to talk.Clearly we are having a fight about stupid shit." She looked at me with tears in her eyes, "Okay. What is there to say Vic? You said it all didn't you?" Now I hate that, where I said everything there is to say crap! No I didn't because I never looked at her side just mine. I don't know what she is thinking or 100% feeling, so come on! "You know that's not true Dee, I don't know your feelings exactly....so tell me. Please?"
I was watching her sitting on our bed sad crying and knowing that she was afraid of losing me, I have told her many times before I'm not going anywhere. I'm not and I have no desire to, we are just hitting a rough patch is all. Basically she was telling me how I take her for granted that she does do things and every time I'm at work she makes and brings me my dinner. Which she's right; I do take it for granted, she takes the time to cook it, pack it into a container and than drive to my work to drop it off. Than she goes home and eats and cleans up or does whatever her mother says as well. So not only does she listen to me bitch and complain she gets it from her mom. Yes, I was realizing I was taking her for granted and that I needed to be more appreciative as well. I did apologize and we were OK. I remember sitting with her on the edge of our bed and her still looking at me with those sad puppy dog eyes with hurt and fear in them. I kissed her on top of her head and said, "I'm really not going anywhere, I'm sorry about not appreciating you enough and I'll try harder not to take you for granted." "Yeah, but people can only handle so much and I'm so afraid of losing you-" "DeeAnna... I-Love-You. You need to believe me when I say I am not going anywhere." She smiled and I smiled and we kissed, finally kissed after an entire day of not a single kiss. Then we layed down and held each other tight, I kept telling her I love you and I'm not going anywhere."
So what is to be gained by this? Maybe it was a silly fight, but it easily could have turned for the worst. We are perfectly fine now of course and like I said then....it is just a rough patch. Couples can work through them usually it just depends again on the individuals involved. If you cannot imagine losing them because you wouldn't only be losing a lover but your best friend than try. If you cannot imagine living a life without them by your side; than try. People don't be so quick to give up; I know that in this day and age we expect everything to happen so quickly, but love is not something quick and over with. Love lasts, it grows with you and your significant other; so let love grow and try to make things better when they seem wrong and most of all don't give up. AND no matter what remember appreciate each other it's the little things that matter to the both of you, don't take them for granted.